Friday, June 06, 2008

Banana Raspberry Glitch...

It's Friday morning. I've been up since about 5:30 AM as usual. I've all the windows opened as it is a cool morning, though we are under an "excessive heat watch" for the next several days. I remember when I was a kid watching a mediocre made for television movie entitled "Heat Wave!" which came out in 1974. I really have only vague recollections of it, but every time it gets terribly hot in the summer, I recall scenes from that forgotten film.

Yesterday morning while drinking my coffee, I felt the urge to Photoshop something. I found an old photo of a woman from 1899. She was overweight and a bit worn looking in the original image. But after the magic of Photoshop, her image was transformed. If only I could figure out a way to use it on myself in reality.

Here's the before and after...

Victorian before/after

Also, this morning, I was in the mood for something different for breakfast. I saw that I had 3 very ripe bananas sitting in the basket. I didn't feel right about throwing them away and "wasting" food, especially in this day and age. "When I was a kid", I thought to myself "my mother would make Banana Bread out of these". There was no way that I felt motivated enough to jump into the production of homemade Banana Bread, but it did start my gears moving.

I then remembered that I had a box of whole wheat pancake mix. "Aha" I said. I'll just make some Banana Pancakes. I decided to puree the bananas in the food processor which was easy enough. I had just one cup of mix left over in the box which was what the directions called for. The other ingredient that I needed was oil. All I had was Olive Oil. "What the hell", I thought, and in it went. I also soon realized that the only milk that I had was Buttermilk. No problem. In it went. Now to add the one egg, the banana glop and I would be ready to go.

Moments after I introduced the tropical smelling glop to the mix, I remembered that I had a bag of frozen raspberries in the freezer. "Mmm...Banana Raspberry Buttermilk Whole Wheat Pancakes" I remember saying aloud like a holy mantra guaranteed to induce some sort of homespun Nirvana. I added a cup of the berries and just for good measure a heavy sprinkle of cinnamon, a few shakes of Splenda, and a dash of Kosher Salt, plus a good shot of my homemade Vanilla Extract ( all thanks to the Barefoot Contessa - I've had mine for about 4 years now).

You would think that these wonderful ingredients would create something heavenly. Alas, no. Somehow in the cooking process ( and I did indeed use the hot griddle with just enough butter spray), they became a hideous concoction of burnt to a crisp/overtly caramelized raspberries mixed with an uncookable yet scalding hot hyper-sweet banana/cinnamon oozing ickiness that could only be glopped onto a plate. Frankly, it tasted as if someone had roasted the innards of some sweet old woman's purse ( think a combo of Rolaids, lilac perfume, and bright red waxy lipstick with a few crumpled Kleenexes for texture) on the griddle and slopped it up.

The syrup helped.

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